Re-establish who you work for and hold to Colossians 3:23. In my attempt to please God he covers me in all other areas.

 10 things every youth leader should remember:

1.  Youth ministry is Family Ministry
2. There is no Us and Them. Be the bridge
3. There is no job within youth ministry where you can only deal with students
4. Parents are your partners
5. Your job is not to replace parents but to empower and support them

 To be continued…I would love to hear your stories and thoughts on dealing with parents in Ministry, please post your comments.

We at SimplyUrban want to make sure you are on the up and up of any new music or videos that would assist you in your ministry. I found another hot one on Youtube by LeCrae.

We  found a great comparison list created by: Chris Dawson (aka) Jeremaya. Jeremaya created a urban alternative list a few years back and it has become popular within his church.  He states, “He saw many list out there but none were marketed towards gospel or rap”. He wanted to expose kids to different type of rap music besides the harmful things they are being exposed to.

 Check out Chris’s list and LeCrae’s new video.

Click here to view file 

Don’t forget to tell us what you think.

Ever wonder why the majority of Sunday morning church services across the globe are the most segregated time. Sad but true and our youth groups are mirroring the same reflections of big church.

 In our society and especially the area where I live, 98% of our students attend diverse schools, live in diverse neighborhoods, and participate in diverse athletics and clubs. A few years ago we noticed many of our students hung out in mixed groups within their schools. Although, our students hung out in diverse groups; they never invited those friends to youth group.

 We are having to re-access the reasons why our youth group looks the way it does. We are examining the words we use, the music we play and the jokes we tell. We discovered sometimes the jokes were using were only relatable to the community we were serving. We were not exposing our students to different genres of music, although many of them listen to more than just hip hop, so we found.

 I think it’s good to look at events and music that your students would relate to but it’s good to challenge them and expose them to other things.

 If we had a glimpse of Heaven I think many of us would be surprised to see there is NO Black side, Asian side, Hispanic side or White side. For many of us this would be a dramatic change. At what times to you socialize with others outside your race? If we seldom crossover as Youth Ministers or Pastors, how do we expect our congregation or our youth to crossover?

 Look for ways to promote diversity in your group.

 To fix this mindset we have chosen to become a Bridge. We began to expose our students to different and diverse conferences, concerts, events and projects. We began to look for events and projects that would promote diversity. We have started collaborating with other youth groups and churches on projects. We have created a network of youth leaders that is diverse.  In doing this it felt very comfortable to us, it’s who we not something we are trying to make ourselves become. If we let down our barriers we would discover we can learn a lot from others.

 Ask yourself has your community changed?

 There have been several studies that show how our communities will change drastically over the next 50 years. Is the church being prepared for that change? If the church continues on without any regard to our changing world we may become ineffective and lose in a changing world. Check out these projected stats:

 Nation’s Changing Makeup

Adjust your strategy

 Don’t get me wrong you are going to reach the blueprint you are called to reach but our communities, schools and neighborhoods are changing, our world is changing. If we the church are going to survive this change, we need to rethink the way we do church and our strategy will need to adjust. We may need a new blueprint; the one we created 10 years ago may not be relevant anymore.

We have thousands of churches that are hosting satellite venues within various areas of their cities and states. Having the same blueprint will not work for all communities and definitely not for all youth groups. Our goal as youth leaders shouldn’t be to only reach the students in our youth groups. We must equip and send our students to reach others in their schools, neighborhoods and communities via friendship evangelism. The world does not look just like them. Students can do it, we have seen them go clear across the world on mission trips and reach hundreds and sometimes thousands. How are we preparing them for the challenge of reaching their schools and neighborhoods?

 It is not changing who you are but it’s about reaching those God has placed in your community for you to reach. Sometimes that requires a change in strategy! 

Check out Mary Mary’s video “I Worship You”. Thank God for YouTube, Tangle and others that have made videos more readily available.  

Do you incorporate videos into your praise and worship experiences? There are few venues for Christian videos to be displayed on a national level. In our ministry we try to expose our students to what they don’t see on BET or MTV. Students need to see positive videos and hear positive music, so they know they have a choice. YouTube has become a major venue for Christian artist to promote and display their music. Stay turned for more hot Urban finds from YouTube!

Worship is your life surrendered to God in every aspect. Many times we as youth leaders we allow our students to mistake a worship experience as praise, singing, & dancing. Singing and dancing are forms worship but not true worship. Teach your students true authentic worship reflects every aspect of their lives. We must Worship the Lord in Spirit and in Truth (John 4:23-24… Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks. God is spirit, and his worshipers must worship in spirit and in truth.”)

 Teach your students:  Who you are and the way you live that count before God. It’s who you are at school, work, your grades, attitudes and who they are within their relationships. God is concerned about every aspect of our lives. Youth leaders it’s time raise the standard as it relates to Worship. It goes far beyond the bands, praise teams, dance teams, drama ministry and events. Who cares if your band is hitting every note or if you have the best dance team in town! What is the heart condition of those who are worshipping? True worship encompasses our whole being. Worship involves everything about you; everything that you do and every part of your life. Help your students understand how to Worship the Father in Spirit and in Truth. To the degree that your life is submitted to God, to that degree you are a true worshiper. This heart posture creates a wonderful worship experience!

Using spoken word as a ministry tool in youth ministry. Spoken word is simply a “WORD that is Spoken aloud”.  Spoken word is a form of literary art or artistic performance in which lyrics, poetry, or stories are spoken rather than sung. Spoken-word is often done with a musical background, but emphasis is kept on the speaker. Using spoken word can be a powerful way to drive a point home with students. It allows scripture and testimonies to come alive.

Check out how we use Spoken word to minister to students.

\”A Different Kind of Graditude\” performed by Destinations at SONset

Scar by: Maya

This last year in ministry has been one of the most mentally and physically challenging for me. I’m learning to live in a place of surrender and dependency on the Holy Spirit, definitely. I think it’s just the trials that we all face to make us stronger and to deepen our faith.I’m discovering as I have been on my journey, many of my friends have been on the same journey just in different ways. I ‘m learning to appreciate this seasoning in my life and to be  thankful for all the resources created for such a time as this! 

 I read Doug Fields book “What Matters Most” a few years ago. I decided to really re-calibrate myself this year and read it again. It was exactly what I needed, again. I suggested the book to a great friend of mine who is not in Youth ministry. I felt the book was written broad enough to captivate a vast number of audiences, regardless of your career or ministry roles. The principles transcend for anyone not just youth workers! My friend was really impacted by the book and wanted to write her thoughts here on SimplyUrbanMinistry Blog!

 When I began reading the book “What matters Most”, I amazed out how someone else in the world totally understood what I was feeling and experiencing at the exact moment. For so long, I wore my busyness as a “badge of honor” and if you weren’t working at least to the same level of intensity, then you weren’t really that serious for the Kingdom of Christ. But underneath my badge of honor were scars and new wounds of chronic fatigue, anxiety, soul neglect, relationship disappointment, family absenteeism, poor physical health, and a lack luster life. It was at this moment that I realized that my constant hurried turbo-pace of doing ministry was not healthy. I literally at the moment had to ask God to help me undo the bad decisions and poor boundaries that were leading me down the path to an inevitable life crash.  This book applies to everyone that serves in ministry, especially those that do it in full time a capacity, because for this unique sector of the population our work and ministry often morph into one entity that consume everything.  This book was literally a saving grace and I thank God for my best friend recommending the book.  My friend could see that my heart do the work of the ministry was enormous, but the method by which I was getting it done for some 13 years now was heading me for a life crash. After all, I wanted that abundant life that God promises in scripture, but what I had begin to settle for was everything contrary to that in the name of serving God, and the work of God was impacting my relationship with God. This book isn’t saying stop serving! This is not that book!  But it does help you see that you can be more effective if you know what matters most. You know, those things that you want to say “yes” to like, family, meaningful friendships, significant others, ministry or important tasks God has called you specifically to do.  The first important yes in our lives is to a vibrant, personal, intimate and growing relationship with Jesus Christ. 

 I think sometimes Christian forget that scripture tells us that “His yoke is easy, and his burden is light”.  I learned from this book that I must make the daily decision to honor the things in my life that are worth the “yes”, and have the courage to say “no” to those things, even with the best of intentions, that will lead me a hurried life of insignificance.

 Lynnette Roberts

Written by: Volunteer Youth Leader Shawnice Wilson

Shawnice wrote this letter after our team traveled to Orlando for the Youth Pastor Summit last week. Shawnice has volunteered in youth ministry for over 10 years. She and her husband have dedicated their lives to student leadership development.

I was thinking this morning that our youth workers could use a word of thanks.  I attended a Youth Pastor’s Conference this week.  It had great speakers and entertainment and it offered a time of refreshing and refocusing that was much needed for me.  Yet, there was one thing that bothered me.  There was a question that was asked in two of the sessions I attended – one a main session and the other a breakout session.  The question was “How many of you have ever thought about quitting youth ministry?”  I saw tens to maybe hundreds of youth ministry volunteers throw their hands into the air.  What I saw made my heart sink.  I immediately began to think “What can we do?  What’s missing?  What’s lacking?  Is it that they lack the spiritual depth to handle such a position, the greater understanding of what it means to be a youth worker – sacrifice?  Is there a training that we can provide to help these distraught youth workers? 

In all my years of youth ministry, I have never felt that way.  Frustrated – yes, disappointed -yes, in awe of parent responses and student mistakes – yes, but never have I had the desire to quit.  I have also never been the top guy (Youth Pastor) so maybe this has something to do with it, but I have been a leader in youth ministry.  I thought is there something that I have that I can transfer to them – hope, inspiration, whatever – so that they never come to that place again?  Is there something I can do to help them be empowered to the point that the thought of quitting never rises to the top again?  I immediately began to chronicle thoughts of topics in my mind and I even wrote some down.  I then decided to talk to my Youth Director (Pastor) about my feelings on what I had experienced.  We dialogued for a while and in the conversation he said something that resonated with me.  He said, “Sometimes what they need is encouragement.”  So here goes.

For every time the parent’s came to you with their extremely negative comments, off the wall remarks, far left understanding of what was going on, and even direct attacks on your person and you came back at them with the love of CHRIST, even though this may not have been what you were feeling inside (LOL!) – THANK YOU!

For your countless hours of service in front and behind the scenes and your willingness to be inconvenienced continually – THANK YOU!

For your face being the only representation at the football game, for encouraging the young lady who had no hope or confidence in herself, for loving the students in spite of who they are – THANK YOU!

For your heart to serve the LORD faithfully – THANK YOU!

For everything you do – THANK YOU!

You may not see the fruit immediately but what you say does matter.  Don’t be discouraged by the texting during your messages, the blank stares, and seeming lackadaisical, apathetic behavior of the teens in your ministry.  They hear you.  I say this because I was one of those teens. I grew up in a very traditional church.  I wasn’t feeling their way of living.  However, I was forced to sit there week after week and listen to the messages presented.  Now, I am glad that I did.  There were probably pieces of several messages that have impacted my decisions since then, but there is one that I remembered some years later that saved my life.  It was a message on the reality of hell.  In that moment when I thought just briefly to take my life, that message came back to my mind.  It was a simple statement from the message.  The minister said that in hell I’d burn forever without any relief.  I knew that I did not want that, that I wanted to go to heaven to avoid such an eternity.  This is all just to say that what you do does matter.  BE ENCOURAGED!  DON’T YOU EVER GIVE UP!  Your life, your call, your heart, your passion matters more than you could ever know.  So, for all the students that have never said it, but that have experienced life change I would like to say – THANK YOU!

 Shawnice Wilson

This blog was written by Courtney Harkness one of the great minds in youth ministry that I have the honor and privilege of working with everyday. Courtney presents a new perspective and high standard, as it relates to teens and dating.

It’s difficult to talk to any teenager for any length of time without eventually hitting the topic of dating.  For many of them, it seems to be their top priority.  The status and affirmation they receive from a dating relationship often times fills the void they may feel from other significant, but missing, relationships.  Of course, having a teenage crush is a natural part of growing up, but is taking the next step to boyfriend/girlfriend necessary?   Should teenage dating be considered too much, too soon?  The culture seems to fully endorse teenage romance, even with all of the recent stories of dating violence.  And even the temptation of premarital sex doesn’t seem to deter families from pushing their teens to pursue romantic relationships at an early age.  Teen dating is so pervasive throughout our culture that most people accept it as innocent – but is it really?  The possessive labels of “boyfriend” or “girlfriend” usually imply expectations that most teens are not ready to handle.  More often than not, teenagers find themselves compromising or crossing boundaries just to maintain the romance.  Relationships are difficult, even for adults, and teens are far less equipped to deal with the pressures.  So, is teenage dating as harmless as the culture makes it seem, or have we become so numbed by our sexually charged culture that we fail to recognize when our children are in danger?

Current statistics warn us of serious teen problems that are connected to romantic relationships.  Rising teenage pregnancy, an epidemic of sexually transmitted diseases, and increasing emotional health issues due to broken hearts – these are all byproducts of unhealthy relationships.  We must consider what impact we could have on these issues if teens weren’t as eager to rush into romance.  It may seem impossible to change, but these risks are flooding teenage culture with temptations that are so effective that they must be intentionally coming from somewhere – or maybe from someone.  With that perspective, teenage dating begins to look more and more like an enticing trap.  No need to fear, though, because scripture gives us encouragement:

When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the LORD shall lift up a standard against him.

Isaiah 59:19 (KJV)

This verse teaches that God uses a high standard as a defense against temptation.  If we can raise a new standard amongst teenagers, then we can protect them against the many relationship dangers.  If we could delay romantic relationships until the teenage years have passed – until they’ve matured a bit more – how much more healthy could their future relationship be?  I challenge teens to exchange their romantic relationships for healthy friendships.  It may sound unpopular, but it would prove 100% effective for guarding their hearts.  A teenager with a higher standard and deeper conviction against premature dating will have no problems with emotional baggage or resisting premarital sex.  It’s only when people step close to their boundaries that they find themselves slipping across.  And too many teens are slipping – it’s time to raise the bar.    

What are your thoughts as it relates to Teens and Dating?

Tasha: How have you seen this process unlock God’s plan for your life? Others?

•Zarat: One major change was my commitment to work 6 days and rest 1 day each week. Sabbath rest for the recovering workaholic is a “must-have” plan for restoration and renewal. This has been challenging while caring for a young child with special needs, serving in ministry full-time, operating a business, and “living”, but for me it is like eating and drinking. It has become a non-negotiable for me.

•I have seen people let go and be released into living out who they are created to be

•I have seen been accept the responsibility to streamline and cut out unnecessary things.

•I have seen people give themselves permission to excel.

•I have transformation in their lives.

 Tasha: What are the benefits to the process?

•Zarat: Greater awareness and clarity of your giftedness and your life purpose

• The Process culminates in the creation of a working plan—an action plan, a response plan—that will carry you from your new levels of self-discovery to very practical applications in each of the five domains of your life: personal, family, vocation, spiritual, and community. 

•You receive a custom-tailored MasterPlan that defines your total-life strategy.  It is a charted pathway and a spiritually-guided 2-day process, leading toward your focused LifeMission with detailed, measureable action plans to help you begin to fulfill this mission. All work is done on flip-chart paper in sequential order and later put into electronic form.

Tasha: Why do you think the process is becoming more common?

•Zarat: There is a desperate need for it.

•People hunger for greater focus, productivity, and desire more than just success

I pray this discussion may have answered a few of your questions and sends you on a journey of self discovery. What pathway is God creating with your life? I dare you to discover it! For more information on Life Planning  Advanced LifePlan Facilitator: Zarat Y. Boyd www.themaxlifesolution.com – web, Zarat@themaxlifesolution.com – email

 Zarat Boyd, a passionate leader, has over 10 years of experience in creating dynamic learning environments for children, teens, young adults, and adult learners through customized sessions, seminars, classes, workshops, and facilitations. She has worked with colleges, elementary schools, city government, church and parachurch organizations, and businesses as well as leaders at levels to assist them in accomplishing their goals.  She is the first African American woman certified LifePlan facilitator. She is a professionally trained life coach, certified personality trainer, and strategic planning facilitator. She serves as the Director of the Center for Creative Leadership & Ministry Innovation (CCLMI) at Destiny Metropolitan Worship Church and also serves as the President of MaxLife, Inc. Her educational background includes a BA in International Relations and a MA in Leadership. She and her husband, Damian, live in Marietta, Georgia and are proud parents of their son, an emerging leader.