One of the things God longs for is fellowship with His children. Not the “in-passing” kind of fellowship but the “sit-down-and-enjoy-one-another” kind of fellowship. In fellowship, we discover that one of the other ways we get to know Him better is by getting to know other Christ followers better as well. Students are good at this kind of fellowship relationship. They seem naturally to gravitate to their peers who are like-minded.

Have you ever thought about how fellowship is like rain? The right amount of rain brings life and refreshment. Spring is the time the earth longs for rain so that seeds can begin to sprout and grow. In a similar way, Christ followers long for the fellowship with the Father and His children. Fellowship helps believers grow and sprout spiritually.

We all experience times in our spiritual lives when things click along at a good pace; then suddenly we find ourselves in a slump. Maybe the slump is a lack of spiritual vitality. The remedy may include more intentional, consistent time with the Father through prayer and Bible study. It may include more focused prayer and intentionality in reaching those we know who do not know Christ. And it could well include more devoted time and fellowship with other believers.

Like a good rain during a dry spell, fellowship with other believers can rejuvenate and refresh one’s soul. Fellowship with believers can’t replace spending time with God, but it can encourage, inspire, and refresh your soul. Consider the following questions and how you are or are not using fellowship in your ministry:

·         What fellowship opportunities do you provide for those with whom you minister?

·         What fellowship opportunities do you provide for the students in your group who do not normally place themselves in the midst of a group?

·         What fellowship opportunities do you provide that will give the excuse to get involved in others’ lives?

·         What fellowship opportunities do you provide for yourself?

The various parts of the body need to be connected to the body. Affording students the opportunity to get together is important. The adults and parents who serve alongside you in ministry need the same opportunities as well. Many times the adults who work with students get little time to spend with other adults. Give them the chance to spend time with other adults without the students around. Let them share with one another what God is doing in, around, and through them. Make sure the adult classes they would be attending continue to minister to them by inviting them to their class events, keeping them on their email lists, and updating them with prayer concerns.

Provide opportunities for parents of students to get together too. Often, parents gather only for training or to confront a problem or challenge that they may be facing. Give parents a chance to gather for the sake of just being together.

If you are the main leader, head honcho, tag-you’re-it person in your student ministry, remember that you also need time of refreshing and fellowship. No one really expects you to be the fountainhead all the time.

Fellowship is a great thing. It is vital for all Christ followers to be involved in the lives of other believers. Without fellowship we dry up, get cranky, see things negatively, and become unpleasant. So provide a fellowship fountain of rain for your students, your ministry partners, the parents of your teenagers, and yourself. Bring on the spiritual rejuvenation that fellowship brings and watch relationships blossom.

As a full-time Youth Pastor, one of the most enjoyable pieces of ministry was watching students emerge as leaders. I looked forward to investing in the lives of a key group of students who then became motivators of spiritual and numerical growth in our student ministry. 

There are some things to consider before building your student leadership group. First, be careful in how you select your group. You don’t want to exclude a quiet student who really would emerge as a leader if just given the chance. I would suggest that you ask all students to indicate their interest in being on a leadership team. Allow students from all grades to be on the team.

Ask students to complete a leadership team application to reveal a little about their personal relationship with the Lord and their desire to be a student leader. You can design your application to reflect your desires for your group. You might ask the students to make a personal commitment to things such as the following: attendance at Bible study and youth activities, a personal daily quiet time with God, and an extra commitment to attend student leader training or enrichment events. You can determine the number of students you can effectively disciple and commission to be your group of student leaders. If your student ministry is divided into a middle school, junior or senior high divisions, you can consider forming leadership teams that sometimes function within those age groups and sometimes function together for overall student events.

Once you have determined who will select your student leaders, you can then motivate them to lead. Here are four ways to get your students excited about leading:

1. Plan a leadership retreat. One of the most exciting times for me as a student minister was when I took my first leadership team on a weekend retreat. I used the weekend to talk about my expectations for the team. We then talked about their dreams for our student ministry.

2. Give students responsibilities with enough guidance to ensure their success. I have found that when given responsibility, students will achieve what we believe they can handle. Your belief in their ability and your availability of guidance as needed will empower them to own your student ministry and be totally connected.

3. Help your leadership team begin to invest in other students. As you watch your leadership team grow, encourage them to begin to invest in students who are marginally involved in your student ministry. Just as you feel strengthened in watching your leadership team mature in their faith and leadership, your students will be strengthened when they see other students begin to grow with their encouragement.

4. Give your leadership team a voice in your church. Your student leaders should be asked to serve on ministry teams and in leadership positions alongside the adults in your church. As your church begins to assign people to ministry teams, make sure they remember that your students are just as much a member of your church as the 40-somethings and senior adults. As students take part in more ministry opportunities, God may just call out these students and lead them to ministry vocations or future church leadership ministries.

If you’re looking for a great place to take your student leaders to help develop, train, and inspire them, then look no further.   For more information, chick “Resources”

One Love,

JW

I have a confession to make. In the first few years of my ministry, I did not do a good job reaching the hard-to-reach crowd. In my first few years of ministry, I brought in students who looked like me, acted like me, and liked the same sort of things that I did.  After a discussion with a student ministry leader about my failure to reach the hard-to-reach student, I began to adapt my ministry and my attitude. 

Here are a few quick things God taught me through His Word and others He placed in my life:

1.      All people matter to God, and He desires to reach all nations. He reminds us that we are created “in His own image” (Gen. 1:27) and He died for everyone (John 3:16).

2.      Some people can be close to Him and still miss Him. Our role is to bring students to the foot of the cross and allow the Holy Spirit to draw them to God through Jesus. Judas Iscariot was with Jesus in close proximity but still missed Him. Many times we consider ourselves failures when some get away.

3.      Do not associate or work only with people who think and act just like you. A variety of personality types are needed to reach the multitudes of students who need Christ. Just by looking at the makeup of the 12 disciples, it is obvious God uses different types of people to fulfill His mission. Gather people in your student ministry who are multifaceted, come from different walks of life, and have differing personalities and spiritual giftings.

4.      Go hang our where the hard-to-reach students hang out. Within the last year a new skate park has opened in our town. I am not the skater type, but I have hung out there a few times over the past month. I put myself there to meet them where they are. It is not easy to care about reaching people we do not know.

5.      Ask these questions frequently of yourself and of others who work with you in ministry: “Who has God placed in our community for us to reach?  What are we going to do to reach them?” Learn to see people through the eyes of Christ as people for whom He died.

6.      Constantly remind students involved in your ministry that they are the best to reach other students. Do not just tell them, but provide tools and opportunities to invite their nonchurched friends and the people they see at school to opportunities your church provides.

7.      Do not hold all the meetings and activities at your church. Those who are hard to reach have no desire to come to your church. You may even have to help them forget or get past some of the hurtful times they have experienced at church.

8.      Invest time, some more time, and then a little more time with the hard-to-reach students. The present generation of students is longing for authentic relationships with someone who is real. Be real and be with them in settings that are non-threatening.

9.      Train your leaders and your students by modeling for them what it means to reach the hard-to-reach. Love and encourage then and help them to know through His Word and throughout His life, Christ reached out to the hard-to-reach.

10.  Pray that God will strengthen and encourage you, your students, and your leaders to be intentional in reaching those He has placed around your church.

The Samaritan woman in John 4 is a great example of how Jesus placed Himself where the hard-to-reach would be. As a result, many other Samaritans from that town also believed.

What about your town? Your church? The people God has placed in your community who desperately need Him? Are you intentional in praying? Are you intentional in planning? Are you intentional in going? They need you to reach them for Him.

Sexual identity topics dominate the tabloids on many newsstands. What’s more, today’s mixed-up cultural values constantly invade Christian households. While godly parents try to “teach a youth about the way he should go” (Prov. 22:6), ungodly messages shout to teens from every angle. The home has become a major front in the battle for purity and healthy sexual identity formation. 

Distorted Messages
Well-known public figures report “coming out of the closet” in the cover stories of magazines and newspapers. Famous singers and actors promote sexual freedom and smirk at traditional family values. Couples live together outside of marriage. Television comedies affirm gay and lesbian lifestyles, while sexually explicit content dominates movies.

Teens easily “hook-up” with strangers on the Internet through social networks that sometimes accelerate a false sense of interactions and relationships. Teens are exposed to pornographic pictures and sexual messages that chisel away at Christian beliefs.

Prepare Yourself
Centuries ago, Paul warned believers about the dangers of the world’s influence on our lives. He pointed out that believers do not battle against flesh and blood but against unseen spiritual forces (Eph. 6:12). So, why are parents of teens caught off guard when the families encounter issues related to sexual identity?

In the face of an ungodly environment, parents can help. Teens may not say it, but they need and want parental attention. A common way teens cry out is to act out. As a result, parents need to be aware of what their teens are and are not saying.

Spend time with your teen. Observe what they do and ask questions. Listen to learn, not to give a lecture. Pray for the power to remain calm and to listen with love. Recently, sexual identity has become a problem with teens. Sadly, some parents reject the teens before there is any chance of healing. Remember that Jesus started by accepting people where they were. From there, he was able to lead them to a better place in loving and godly ways.

Parent Networking
Many parents are finding support through groups at churches and in homes. These groups usually meet once or twice a month to discuss ways to deal with a multitude of teen problems. Meetings can include: special speakers, panels, hands-on Internet training, parent/youth dialogs, fellowships, family meals, and prayer times. Topics covered have sometimes included: piercings, tattoos, text messaging, sexual identity problems, dating and limitations, understanding social online networking (MySpace, instant messaging, and online predators), parent/teen communication.

As you take note of the distorted sexual messages in our culture, use them as conversation starters with your teen. In the process, prepare yourself to be on guard and alert to face the mixed messages of our culture. Remember to listen more than you lecture and then find ways to fuel your tank by spending time with other parents. Your networking might save your teen as you compare notes with other parents and stand firm together against a culture of faulty sexual messages.

Written by Benny Dixon

I am somewhat of a health nut. With that said, I recently had to eat a kind of meat that I do not care for at all. It was brought about by overextending myself and not getting things done in a timely manner. My lack of “on-timeness” brought about great anguish, frustration, and even righteous anger directed toward me (and rightly so, I might add) ….and my least favorite meat to eat – crow. Thankfully, I have not had to eat it as a steady diet. 

Here are a few lessons that I have learned from this experience:

1.      People are counting on me to do what I say I will do. When I don’t keep my commitments, it causes everyone trouble.

2.      Failure to do my part in a timely manner is perceived as “you only care about yourself and really do not respect others.” Sounds harsh, but perception translates into reality. When I do not keep my commitments, everyone suffers.

3.      Sorry is a tough word to say. Admitting that I was wrong is the hardest part, but actually admitting it to someone else shows them honor and respect. They can accept my apology (which is always good), or they may trash me. No matter how they respond, it is right for me to apologize.

4.      Crow is not really good meat to eat. It swells up in my mouth as I chew it, and it is hard to swallow. A steady diet of it can wreak havoc on my testimony and witness.

5.      Forgiveness is a wonderful thing whether I am asking for it or granting it.

I am thankful that I serve a God of second chances. I am thankful that the people I have the opportunity to serve alongside in ministry are forgiving. I am also thankful that they confront me with weaknesses in my life. I can’t say I always like it, but I can say that I am thankful they care enough not to leave me the way I am. That is the great thing about God. He loves us too much to leave us that way.

If you need to admit you were wrong about something, I encourage you to make it right today. Take your bite of crow, say you are sorry, and ask for forgiveness. You can do it! You will strengthen your witness and set a godly example for others to follow. 

Benny Dixon is a 40-something worker with students, parents, and their leaders.

No boy is guaranteed the privilege of manhood because manhood is more than just physical maturity- it’s a vision of faith, discipline, and masculine nobility that directs life choices and shapes the boy’s core identity. Robert Lewis offers guidance and resources for fathers desiring to intentionally establish foundations for manhood into their sons.

Images of Manhood and CeremoniesI
If you doubt the power of vision, flip on your television. Look at the images of manhood. Too often you see men who never grew into manhood. They are indecisive, selfish, and altogether shallow. They run around many of the responsibilities of genuine manhood. Here’s the true reality: without an authentic vision for manhood, many adult males will spend their energies in self-serving, misguided ways.

Christian dads know what’s at stake in raising boys, and they try hard to do right. But even Christian fathers need the power of a manhood vision to guide their choices in life and to help them raise their sons to be men.

In every major culture in history, men banded together to pass on a manhood vision and to celebrate manhood ceremonies with their sons. In our era, manhood ceremonies have fallen on hard times. If we went by cultural cues, we’d conclude that today’s manhood ceremonies include activities such as chugging beer and mastering the X-box. For teenage boys, the only “manhood ceremonies” they ever experience are those they create for themselves. There is no man to guide and mentor them to manhood.

A Christian Model of Manhood
My manhood vision is based on the two most significant men in history: Adam and Jesus Christ. We all know what Adam did – or more precisely, what he did not do. When everything was on the line, he didn’t take responsibility. He ducked behind Eve. Adam’s failure was not just a moral failure, it was a manhood failure.

Jesus serves as the polar opposite to Adam. He faced challenges far greater than Adam, yet He held firm. His was a vision of faithfulness and nobility at all costs. Bringing together Adam and Jesus, we see that a good vision for manhood includes rejecting passivity, accepting responsibility, leading courageously, and expecting God’s greater reward.

Sons need to hear this message from their fathers. Sons need words of encouragement, a focus on strengths instead of weaknesses. Sons need to hear how they can use their talents in positive, life-giving ways that match God’s vision for manhood.

The Manhood Model at Home
Sons need to see fathers modeling manhood at home, especially with the son’s mother. How a man interacts with his wife teaches the son how to act at home. The son will copy his father from the earliest years. The son is like a blank template, waiting to be pressed in the proper shape.

If your son is already in the teen years or the relationship has been difficult, it’s never too late for a fresh start. Sons want to connect to their fathers, no matter how old they are and no matter how badly you may have messed things up. If you have missed the mark with your son, now is the time to start anew. Go to a few Christian men for counsel. When the time is right, go to your son and apologize for letting your interests distract you from the relationship he needs with you.

Fathers, it’s up to you to share the power of a Christian vision for manhood with your son. Nature won’t do it for you, and our culture will only deposit a miscast vision that leads to regret. Take responsibility for raising your son. If you do, you’ll someday know the satisfaction of watching your son drive off to college prepared – not just to take his classes seriously, but also to take the call to authentic manhood seriously.

How many times have you traveled and left some important items at home? It happens to all of us from time to time. We find ourselves wasting time and resources trying to replace certain items, or we simply try to survive without them.  Sometimes, however, going without them is not an option. 

This happens often in youth ministry, and you may not even realize it. Youth pastors travel far and wide to reach students, yet leave some of the most basic tools behind.  We’ve got to grab hold of the one tool that youth understand and use every day – the internet.

Many of you have no idea where to start. I constantly hear questions such as “Don’t I need to know HTML to build a website?” or “How much money will this take?” After reading this article, hopefully you will have some ideas about where to begin.  

Here are four free tools you can use on the internet to reach your students:

·         Social Networks – These exist to help people connect online. Ask your students which ones they are using, and create profiles on them. This will allow you to see what your students are talking about, who they are communicating with, and keep you informed about what is relevant to their generation.  Create groups on these networks for your youth group, which will help you keep your students updated and serve as a landing page for their friends to learn more.

Recommended: Facebook (http://www.facebook.com)

·         Blogs  – A blog is one of the easiest tools to manage to inform both students and their parents. There are several websites that offer free blog accounts. Before you start writing, make sure you are being intentional. Whether it is a post about last night’s football game or a mission trip update for parents, keep it short and to the point. People don’t enjoy reading novels on screen. Write a new post a couple of times a week.

Recommended: Wordpress (http://www.wordpress.com)

·         Video Sharing – If you don’t have a video camera or can’t afford one, keep it simple. Use your cell phone or a webcam. Publishing a video is entirely free on many video sharing websites. Use funny and interesting videos to connect with your youth to make announcements, convey a spiritual message, or just give them something fun to watch.

Recommended: Vimeo (http://www.vimeo.com)

·         Photo Sharing – Like video, there are several free photo-sharing sites. Social networks let you create albums as well. Post pictures from recent youth events and share them with your students. Offering valuable content like pictures will keep them coming back often, allowing you to use the internet as a constant channel of communication.

Recommended: Flickr (http://www.flickr.com)

Never forget that your content is up against literally everything else on the internet. What does this mean for you? You must update your accounts frequently. Set aside a time (or two or three) each week to upload to videos and pictures. If you’re using social networks, update your status a few times a day so people will know that you are active.

A piece of advice for those who are ready to jump in: don’t create more profiles than you can manage. Start by using one site for each type of media. 

Balance Resources with Personality

Perhaps the hardest part of being involved in social media is choosing what to say and when. There is no perfect formula for this. However, one recommendation I always make is to balance resources with personal updates. Yes, of course you want your students to read a daily devotion – so post one to your profiles daily. However, don’t be a robot! If you just fell out of the chair at your desk – tell them. The more personality you show, the more receptive they will be to the resources you provide. And let’s not forget – the root of what you are trying to do is taking advantage of the internet to build relationships with students. 

How many times have you attended student ministry training events and returned home ready to implement new ideas, to challenge your ministry team to a deeper commitment, and to more clearly focus your day to accomplish the goals of your ministry and become a more deeply committed Christ follower in the process? Here are some ideas to help follow through with your intentions in your life and ministry. Whether it was a recent student ministry conference or something you discovered at camp this past summer, certainly there has been at least one “ah-ha” moment in your life sometime this year. Sometimes your day is so fast-paced and tightly scheduled that you literally don’t have time to stop and organize your thoughts. You want to take action on your “ah-ha” moment but life gets in the way. Whether you have a new idea or a brand new direction in which you would like to head, consider these ideas to help you move from intentions to something real in your life and ministry.

Prior to Training Events
Before you attend a leadership training event, do your homework. Look over the event program and agenda. Take some time to write out your own personal plan for ministry education while in attendance. Write a main reason for attending the event and then several personal goals to meet while at the event.

Another prior-to-the-event idea is to spend some time thinking about areas in which you are struggling in your ministry. Make a list of questions you would like to ask that would help you evaluate and strengthen that area. Ask your own student ministry leadership if there are any areas they would like to see strengthened. Then use your list while you are at the leadership event. While the content planned at the event may not directly relate to your areas of concern, you can ask both the presenters and peers to share what has and has not worked in their ministries.

A final before-you-leave activity should to be to meet with your education pastor or pastor to share what you intend to learn and achieve while at the event. You might ask for feedback to see if he has suggestions for you while at the event. At this meeting, you can go ahead and set a time and date to meet again to review what you discover at the event.

While at the Event
If you have attended similar events before and seem to wander in thought during the presentations, ask God to truly give you a spirit of seeking and hearing and learning while at the event. Take a pen and notepad to write down ideas and to gather information. Don’t be tempted to skip out on meetings just because you have been there and done that before. There might be a student ministry newcomer at that very meeting who needs to learn from your ministry experience. Have an open heart to learn new things and to honestly evaluate your ministry as both new and old ideas are expressed.

Don’t forget the networking that can sometimes be more beneficial to you than the presentations. Instead of asking the size of someone’s youth group, ask the person to tell how God is using his students on the local high school campus. Ask how he equips, trains, and keeps his leadership team excited and involved in students’ lives.

You can also be a huge encouragement to the new student minister at the event. You were the newcomer once and had a burden for students and no clue where to begin. Seek to find at least one newcomer at each event you attend. It is so easy to group up with those we have formed relationships with in student instead of looking for someone who needs to be pulled in to experienced ministry circles. Bring someone in and allow God to use you in a great way.

When You Return Home
When you return home, give yourself a deadline in which to process what you have learned, and then write a few specific goals you would like to achieve based on what you learned. Don’t let the time and money you spent on a conference be wasted. You can file the useful information and make notes regarding things you need to continue to research and pray about.

Even if you didn’t have a meeting with your pastor prior to your most recent event, set a time to meet with him. Make personal notes ahead of time and give him a copy of your notes. In your meeting, share the following information in a concise and brief format:

·         The thing that most impacted you at the event and how God spoke to you.

·         Your top priority based on something you learned at the event.

·         An idea that you believe might benefit your ministry or your church as a whole.

·         Then ask for his feedback based on what you have shared.

You can use questions such as:

·         How do you think this might impact our church and our student ministry?

·         Can you hold me accountable for the following…?

·         Do you know of someone who has taken a similar direction in their ministry? Would it be beneficial for me to contact that person?

Continuing education is important for you to continue to grow personally and professionally in student ministry. Don’t ever feel that you can’t take off to attend an event. The time you invest away from the daily routine will inspire and renew your passion for ministry. If you do not have a personal plan for ministry education, begin planning a yearly plan for you to grow and mature in your professional ministry vocation.

Ever wonder why the majority of Sunday morning church services across the globe are the most segregated time. Sad but true and our youth groups are mirroring the same reflections of big church.

 In our society and especially the area where I live, 98% of our students attend diverse schools, live in diverse neighborhoods, and participate in diverse athletics and clubs. A few years ago we noticed many of our students hung out in mixed groups within their schools. Although, our students hung out in diverse groups; they never invited those friends to youth group.

 We are having to re-access the reasons why our youth group looks the way it does. We are examining the words we use, the music we play and the jokes we tell. We discovered sometimes the jokes were using were only relatable to the community we were serving. We were not exposing our students to different genres of music, although many of them listen to more than just hip hop, so we found.

 I think it’s good to look at events and music that your students would relate to but it’s good to challenge them and expose them to other things.

 If we had a glimpse of Heaven I think many of us would be surprised to see there is NO Black side, Asian side, Hispanic side or White side. For many of us this would be a dramatic change. At what times to you socialize with others outside your race? If we seldom crossover as Youth Ministers or Pastors, how do we expect our congregation or our youth to crossover?

 Look for ways to promote diversity in your group.

 To fix this mindset we have chosen to become a Bridge. We began to expose our students to different and diverse conferences, concerts, events and projects. We began to look for events and projects that would promote diversity. We have started collaborating with other youth groups and churches on projects. We have created a network of youth leaders that is diverse.  In doing this it felt very comfortable to us, it’s who we not something we are trying to make ourselves become. If we let down our barriers we would discover we can learn a lot from others.

 Ask yourself has your community changed?

 There have been several studies that show how our communities will change drastically over the next 50 years. Is the church being prepared for that change? If the church continues on without any regard to our changing world we may become ineffective and lose in a changing world. Check out these projected stats:

 Nation’s Changing Makeup

Adjust your strategy

 Don’t get me wrong you are going to reach the blueprint you are called to reach but our communities, schools and neighborhoods are changing, our world is changing. If we the church are going to survive this change, we need to rethink the way we do church and our strategy will need to adjust. We may need a new blueprint; the one we created 10 years ago may not be relevant anymore.

We have thousands of churches that are hosting satellite venues within various areas of their cities and states. Having the same blueprint will not work for all communities and definitely not for all youth groups. Our goal as youth leaders shouldn’t be to only reach the students in our youth groups. We must equip and send our students to reach others in their schools, neighborhoods and communities via friendship evangelism. The world does not look just like them. Students can do it, we have seen them go clear across the world on mission trips and reach hundreds and sometimes thousands. How are we preparing them for the challenge of reaching their schools and neighborhoods?

 It is not changing who you are but it’s about reaching those God has placed in your community for you to reach. Sometimes that requires a change in strategy!