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· Decision making
Continue Reading “Get ‘Em Talking – Gr8 Small Group Product”
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I recently had to ask myself some hard questions and then take my situation to my leader. This was uncomfortable, but I needed to be open and honest to deal with the situations that involved my life. I found myself drifting and I needed to address the core issues. Although the situation issue is still in progress, I have peace because I have been open and honest with those I needed to address. Before I approached my leader there were a few things I had to do to make sure I had the spirit of love and not come to them as the accuser of the brethren! I’ve seen many relationships destroyed because of the way conflict was handled. We must remember we cannot handle conflict like its handled in the world. Our thinking must be kingdom minded, and preserving the relationship must be the main focus. When preserving the relationship is not the focus, it opens the door for the situation to become ugly and hurtful.
- We must commit to speaking the truth the bible tells us in Ephesians 4:25 to lay aside falsehood and speak the truth to our neighbor.
- Commit to maintaining a Christ-like attitude one of meekness and gentleness. Meekness is strength under control. When emotions are high it is easy to lose control. In your efforts to be bold like [...]
Continue Reading “Dealing with Conflict in the Church part 2″
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I’m such the peacemaker that my personality does not lend to deal with conflict, anger, bitterness, resentment or really anything negative. I love to live in Peace. You may be asking yourself, “What planet is she from”. You’re right! if I live on earth with others there is no guarantee every situation will present itself as a peaceful one. In the past, I would do anything possible to avoid conflict. I use to view conflict as something negative yet, becoming a leader has pushed me beyond my natural tendencies.. Don’t be fooled conflict will not take care of itself if it’s not dealt with. It becomes a sleeping dragon that could potentially set fire at any moment. Although, conflict can be very uncomfortable it does not have to be viewed as negative. Conflict can be quite healthy. When you mention the word “Conflict” in many setting it’s like saying a bad word. You may be considered a poor manager if you have it on your team, this to is a myth. Conflict does not have to always be terrible. Conflict can be a positive maturing process for the believer. Many times the way we address and handle conflict is the negative part. We live in a fallen sinful world and there is no way things will always be perfect. We will tend disagree or view things from a different perspective than others. Humans are a unique and individualist species. It is difficult at times to maintain positive relationships with [...]
Continue Reading “Dealing with Conflict in the Church Part 1″
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Jeff on February 2nd, 2009
If you’ve always struggled with the stereotypical quiet – time, don’t give up hope!
You’ve been told that you’re supposed to spend time with God. You’ve valiantly set your alarm clock an hour early or worked partway through some ambitious study guides, but sooner or later your busy life creeps back in and steals your resolve. Why do you consistently fail at your quiet times? Maybe it’s because you’ve bought into somebody else’s unrealistic, unsustainable idea of what time with God ought to look like.
Lose the guilt. Drop the unrealistic expectations. You can connect with God stay spiritually full. Doug Fields, pastor at Saddleback Church, offers a simple, uncomplicated plan that you can carry out. All you have to do is: STOP, BE QUIET, MAKE A CONNECTION.
Simple. But not simplistic. If you can practice these habits throughout your day, you will enjoy a new depth and fullness in your spiritual life.
Book includes group study guide and questions. For more information, go to www.simplyyouthministry.com
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Jeff on January 27th, 2009
1) Quit arguing with people about the same old foolishness!
-Respect their position and keep it moving!
2) Quit telling people your secrets when you know they are not going to keep them!
-And if you keep telling them, then quit getting mad when they tell
your secrets!
3) Quit trying to pull people on your journey who don’t want to travel
with you!
-Either they believe in you and value you …or they don’t!
4) Quit complaining about things you can’t and won’t change!
-I am not working on being a size 6 or a model…so instead of
complaining about the weight charts, I negotiated with my doctor for a “comfortable weight for me. ” Forget the charts! I created my own “healthy weight!”
5) Quit gossiping about other people!
-Minding our own business should be a full time job!
6) Quit blaming each other for things that in the big picture aren’t going to matter 3 weeks from now!
-Talk solutions…and then implement them!
7) Quit eating things you know are not good for you!
-If you can’t quit…eat smaller portions! (I know…this is hard for
me too!)
 Quit buying things when we know we can’t afford them!
-If you don’t have self control, then quit going to the [...]
Continue Reading “It’s Okay To Quit!”
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Jeff on January 22nd, 2009
Hip-Hop History
Hip-hop tells the stories of the multiethnic urban youth and the communities they live in, though the lives of inner-city African- Americans take center stage. Hip-hop is about inner-city and lower-class life. It’s about trying to live out the American dream from the bottom up. It’s about trying to make something out of nothing. Hip-hop is about the youth culture of New York City taking over the world. Hip-hop is about dance, art, expression, pain, love, racism, sexism, broken families, hard times, overcoming adversity, and the search for God. Anyone who looks at hip-hop and just sees rap music doesn’t truly understand the history and the current influence hip-hop has on the whole youth culture.
Bakari Kitwana, in the book The Hip-Hop Generation writes: “I have established the birth years 1965-1984 as the age group for the hip-hop generation. However, those at the end of the civil rights/black power generation were essentially the ones who gave birth to the hip-hop movement that came to define the hip-hop generation, even though they are not technically hip-hop generationers. Those folks, who were right at the cusp, were too young to be defined by civil rights/black power and too old to be deemed hip-hop generationers.”
I watched hip-hop evolve from underground house parties in the basements of my friends’ houses to the first Run DMC video [...]
Continue Reading “Can Hip Hop be Holy?”
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Creating genuine relationships with those who work with you begins with having an authentic relationship with the Lord. It’s hard to care when your relationship is not authentic. REAL relationships take time and energy, it’s worth the investment. Leadership Development goes many ways; one of the most important attributes is the relational approach. People have to know you care about them. Many of mistakes we make results from our get the job done mentality. My experience has shown me if you give a little those you follow will give much. Sometimes it’s the phone call or the email that says, “just thinking about you, how are you doing? It’s the little things that make a tremendous difference. Jesus modeled this deep care and concern when he came to see Martha and Mary after the brother Lazarus passed. There are many faucets to the story but the fact remains, Jesus the son of God took time to go see close friends who lost a loved one. Jesus risked being stoned. Jesus arrived 2 days later but he came. Not to mention he washed His is disciple’s feet, what a servant’s heart! Jesus left the blueprint on relationships all we need to do is follow it.
I have a friend who lost a relative; her disappointment came not when she learned of her relative’s departure but when leadership never responded to her email. I’m not saying they intentionally disregarded her; sometimes during the haste we forget to care for those [...]
Continue Reading “Making Time for REALationships Part 2″
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As we launch into 2009, one the most important things I want to make sure that I do this year is to cultivate authentic relationships with those who serve with me. I’m a very relational person but this task becomes very difficult when you lead a larger group of people. I have had to be very creative to make sure people know that I don’t care about them because of what they do. I care about people because of who they are. In the busyness of life, trying to balance family, work, ministry, and your personal life this can be a difficult task. It’s easy as a leader to make this requirement for those you lead but are you implementing REALationships in your life. Volunteers and staff need to know you care about them. You must speak their language. I know many times last year; I missed it. It was too much for me. There is no way possible I can care for everyone on my team. In years past, I had a strategy of pouring into the leaders and having them pour into those who serve under them. This strategy didn’t work across the board this year. Jesus gives us the very example in how he poured into his disciples. Jesus poured into a few and they poured into the multitude.
My plan for this year is to have “One on Ones” with each ministry leader. In my one on ones; I like to get to know my leaders on a more personal [...]
Continue Reading “Making time for REALationships Part 1″
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Jeff on January 9th, 2009
1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate antidepressant.
2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
3. Buy a DVR and tape your late night shows and get more sleep.
4. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, ‘My purpose is to __________ today.
5. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
6. Play more games and read more books than you did in 2008.
7. Make time to practice meditation and prayer. They provide us with daily fuel for our busy lives.
8. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
9. Dream more while you are awake.
10. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
11. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli, almonds & walnuts.
12. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
13. Clear clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and flowing energy into your life.
14. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip, OR issues of [...]
Continue Reading “Don’t Get Bitter; Get Better! – Good Advice for 2009″
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