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One of the toughest issues that most student ministers and parents face revolves around media and entertainment. Students want to be in the middle of all the newest movies, music, television, Internet, and print media. The challenge comes with the abundance of unhealthy media that permeate out culture. On one hand, there are some things in culture about which Christ-followers need to be informed in order to know how to speak the language of the culture. But how do we know what will drag believers down into sin? Where is the balance? What is appropriate and what is not for Christ-followers?
Recognizing the wisdom of feeding our spiritual natures, we have to discipline ourselves to make that happen (James 1:22-25). Old habits die hard, and the flesh seems committed to undermining spiritual nourishment. So, we have to nurture new habits.
A prescription for adults who want to help young people develop a healthy media diet might include these six ideas:
1. Even good kids need coaching. Just as a body driven by an Olympic dream and be seduced by a double cheeseburger or a triple scoop of ice cream, good kids from solid Christian homes and dynamic youth groups will be tempted to entertain themselves with movies, TV shows, and music that are little more than media junk food. That’s why student ministers need to guide even the most serious young Christians toward edifying choices. The level of coaching will need to change as the maturity of the student grows, but the hands-off approach rarely is effective.
2. Avoid a hit-list mentality. In most cases, for those learning to eat healthily, just throwing out sermonettes about nutrition doesn’t work. Instead of giving a rigid list of dietary do’s and don’ts, addressing each person on his or her own level is more effective. In a personal, caring way, discuss that person’s individual needs and goals and detail how the proper media diet can help accomplish them. In the same way, a heavy-handed attempt at controlling a student’s entertainment choices often breeds frustration. That’s because presenting adolescents with a “hit list” of forbidden fare doesn’t build critical thinking skills or involve them in godly decision-making. What does? Taking time to engage students in dialogue about content and messages framed in biblical standards in terms they understand.
3. Maintain a healthy relationship. It is hard to instruct those you do not know. Building a rapport with your teenagers can help you earn the right to give advice. Too many adults – both parents and leaders – believe they have a license to lecture simply because they’ve been around the track a few more times. A close day-to-day relationship is vital to our effectiveness as counselors.
4. Adapt diets to individuals. Recognize that a student’s age and maturity have a significant impact on his or her diet. So it is with popular media. For example, what might be acceptable for a teen may not be suitable for his or her 8-year-old sibling. Keep in mind that there, or course, poisons that should not be consumed by anyone.
5. Help students “dine out” wisely. Students eat best when they’re in a controlled environment, but it they’re at school or somewhere else, they can get into bad habits. Only those who have internalized a biblically based discernment message will leave home equipped to run the marathon of a holy life.
6. Accept your own limitations. Finally, realize all you can do is offer students perspective from your experience and wisdom. We can’t feed them. And though we hate to admit it, we can’t indefinitely control the media diets of the people we love, teens included. After we’ve done our prayerful best to give them healthy guidelines, it’s up to the student.
